Triumphant music and the titles appear over 
            stately Creighton-Ward Manor, Lady Penelope's ancestral home. Less 
            auspicious music introduces Parker, putting his feet up as he reads 
            his paper in the mansion's kitchens. A convertible pulls up just 
            outside the mansion gates, which Parker seems to hear. As he gets 
            up, I think that the newspaper headline just could possibly be a 
            rescue, reporting on London Airport maintaining its less than 
            stellar safety record with "Fire! 98 saved from London plane." 
            However, Parker is more interested in reading more about the "Killer 
            of Clapham"! It's interesting that he keeps up his posh accent when 
            he's on his own, although he reverted to his typical 'Cockney' tones 
            when he was chatting to Lil the cook in Vault of Death. 
            Perhaps he was getting into character? The main entrance bell rings 
            and he scurries up to answer it, grumbling. It's a very old 
            fashioned bell for such a futuristic show, but the contract was 
            always the point, I think. And if it ain't broke…
            Parker opens the door to an American man, who's 
            wearing an unflattering business suit. The man introduces himself as 
            Grafton and insists he has a meeting booked with Lady Penelope. 
            Parker suddenly seems to remember and asks Grafton indoors, but 
            warns him that "'er Ladyship will be a trifle delayed," and suggests 
            that the American waits in the "lib'ry." Grafton's curious if 
            anything's wrong, but Parker quickly assures him that it's "nothing 
            UNTOWARD." Can I just take a moment to point out what a wonderful 
            coverall phrase that is, what sort of 'untowardness' could she 
            possibly be up to? Grafton can clearly think of a few as he leers 
            that from what he's heard "she's certainly worth waiting for!" 
            Parker appears a little flustered at this!
            With Grafton safely packed into the library, 
            Parker calls Penny from the less than subtle 'naked statue phone' on 
            the hall banister. Penny's in FAB 1 all on her own (do does the 
            insurance company know?!) and appears to have just left something 
            'untoward' as she's picked up a "tail" she needs to lose. And 
            judging by her outfit, it was somewhere where she needed a stern 
            hairdo and a black and white pvc dress! Anyway, she tells Parker to 
            let Grafton know she'll be a little while yet, and to make her 
            excuses. Parker wishes her luck losing the tail – and by luck I 
            think he means having a good aim!
            Penelope's 'tail' is another open top 
            convertible, this one containing two sinister looking men dressed in 
            fedoras and trench coats. With their moustaches and, er, accents, 
            they're OBVIOUSLY evil – and a blast of music underscores this! This 
            isn't quite enough for Penelope to justify letting rip her defences, 
            though, and she elects to do a quick check so see if they are who 
            she believes. Apparently she's averse to causing a scene 
            "unnecessarily." Well, quite. Her 'check' consists of letting the 
            convertible catch up with her, and then zooming off when one of them 
            lifts up a small gun and starts shooting her! There's really "no 
            doubt they meant business" and she tries to lose them using some 
            tricks that James Bond would thoroughly approve of.
            First, Penelope lets loose with a big gust of 
            black smoke from FAB1's rear. The baddies go through it and are out 
            the other side without a hitch, which Penelope attributes to their 
            car being "fitted with radar assisted steering" and nothing at all 
            to do with it being a perfectly straight road. Next she tries 
            something just as classic, the old 'oil on the road' which is likely 
            to cause plenty of 'unnecessary' scenes later on if she doesn't get 
            it cleaned up. The bad guys' car squeals for purchase on the road, 
            making the passenger who's holding the gun snarl for the driver to 
            get it under control. Then he reaches for a sub-machine gun! As the 
            oil fails, Penelope concludes that "like FAB One" the car "must have 
            retractable studs fitted to the tyres." Of course! The spy gadget 
            lark is a LITERAL slippery slope of one-upmanship. As the machine 
            gun fires at Lady P, she coolly decides that she has no choice now.
            What SHE has, that the criminals' gadget guy 
            clearly left out due to budgetary constraints, is a CANNON in FAB 
            One's boot (or trunk, for you Americans who are scratching your 
            heads and wondering how she's firing with her feet while driving). 
            In seconds the CANNON has blasted her pursuers to bits and they 
            smash off of the wide country road in a spattering ball of metal and 
            flame. Penelope has clearly mastered her road skills since the last 
            time we saw her behind the wheel (in "Vault of Death"). She rings up 
            Parker to let him know that she's on her way home.
            Businessman Grafton is still waiting for her in 
            the mansion's library, checking his watch when Parker opens the door 
            and tells him that Her Ladyship is on the way. Grafton says "tell 
            her not to rush, I've PLENTY of time" in a way that may as well have 
            'mwhahahaha' after it. Parker's oblivious response is "Oh, good." 
            and he gently closes the double doors again.
            Grafton begins to prove his evilness, firstly by 
            chuckling "Yeah, all the time in the world!" although he still fails 
            to go 'mwhahaha'. Then he takes out a zippo lighter and turns it 
            into a useful gadget for finding hidden safes! For his sake, I hope 
            he didn't go to the same gadget house as the last two guys. Grafton 
            finds the safe hidden under a rug on the floor and then checks the 
            windows for the alarm circuit. He affixes a smallish capsule full of 
            wires beside the alarm wires. That can't be good.
            Penelope breezes in, and hopes that Grafton 
            wasn't "too bored." He assures her that he found the room "most 
            interesting." Mwhahaha! Penelope asks Parker to bring some tea – it 
            doesn't seem like he brought evil Grafton any at all! When she and 
            Grafton are comfortably seated, she enquires what sort of charity 
            he's collecting for. He quickly puts her straight, saying he's part 
            of a big business syndicate concerned with running the 
            Pacific-Atlantic Monorail! He says it's got "Five hundred miles of 
            track and the finest monotrain ever designed"! Penelope digs for a 
            little more information, and Grafton blusters that the train is 
            "completely automatic." Penelope thinks this sounds very exciting, 
            and asks how much money he actually needs. Grafton says it totals 
            around $40 million! He hastily assures her that he wouldn't expect 
            all that to come from one person! He also tells her that profits for 
            the investor will be very, very high!
            Penelope is extremely reluctant to join, saying 
            she doesn't have a "lot" of money. Grafton points out, rather 
            rudely, that the pictures (not paintings!) in the room alone would 
            "amount to a few million bucks!" He also suggests her jewel 
            collection, which is apparently "internationally famous." Grafton, 
            you're REALLY not going to get Penny's good side by suggesting she 
            flogs her ancestral belongings. At this slightly awkward moment, 
            Parker appears with the tea and hands Lady Penelope a telegram. As 
            she starts to read it, Grafton blatantly leans forward to take a 
            peek until Penny shoots him a sharp look and he sits back in a 
            hurry! The telegram reveals that the mansion is in 'Foxleyheath' and 
            it reads "His chauffeur is a crook" from Parker, who innocently 
            checks that it isn't "bad news." No, she assures him, "just a little 
            disturbing," and thanks him quite warmly, sending him out for now.
            Grafton continues his sales pitch, insisting "the 
            scheme can't miss." Here, Penelope rather pathetically claims that 
            as a "mere woman" she never finances business ventures. Well, she's 
            using the prejudices of the time to her advantage here! Ironic, yes, 
            but a disturbing relic of past attitudes? Yes. It's clever, as he 
            will totally underestimate her! However, she tells Grafton that she 
            has a "friend" who might get involved as he's interested in 
            "scientific development" and is also "very wealthy." The "wealthy" 
            part gets Grafton REALLY excited. He wants to get hold of her 
            "friend" asap but she firmly says that she'll try to put them in 
            touch with Grafton and INNOCENTLY asks if his 'chauffeur' might like 
            a cup of tea.
            
            
            Outside the mansion, the aforementioned 
            'chauffeur' is taking pictures of the building from inside the 
            convertible. He certainly has the show's 'criminal' face and 
            expression, anyway. A short moment later, Penelope is showing 
            Grafton out of the door and he says he "sure enjoyed visiting you." 
            Mwhahaha! When he drives off, Penelope is rather shocked that 
            "extraordinary" man "didn't even touch his tea." Parker's in the 
            kitchen again and keeps an eye on the two men as they leave.
            In the convertible, Grafton discusses the meeting 
            with his 'chauffeur'. The 'chauffeur' is upset that Grafton failed 
            to get any "dough outta her" but Grafton assures him he's already 
            "cased the joint" and knows exactly where the safe is, and he's also 
            "fixed" the alarms! As long as they don't clean the windows or open 
            the curtains or anything, yes, it's a foolproof gadget. Grafton is 
            sure that Lady Penelope will pay up "whether she likes it or not"! 
            Oh boy.
            Parker meets Penelope in the drawing room and 
            tells her more about Grafton's 'chauffeur'. The guy's name is 
            Malloy, and he was driver for an American mob that tried to "queer 
            our pitch" (it was the 1960s…) when Parker was part of a criminal 
            gang a few years back. Redemption isn't for everyone, eh Parker? 
            Penelope claims to be "fascinated" by Parker's "adventurous" life, 
            and Parker wonders whether this really means that Grafton is 
            "shady." Penelope's view is that the project sounds too good to be 
            true, and then sensibly elects to run it by a certain Jeff Tracy as 
            "he'll know what to do."
            Now we're on Tracy Island! The camera pans across 
            the lounge, and it appears that they're all working hard on a big 
            project. Alan and Tin-Tin are examining blueprints spread over the 
            coffee table, while Brains, Jeff and Scott are gathered in the 
            centre of the lounge discussing a cool looking vehicle design 
            displayed on an upright board. At this point, Lady Penelope's 
            portrait starts blinking and beeping. Jeff answers it with a "What's 
            up, Penny?"
            Penelope confirms her disdain for American 
            'slang' by tersely replying "nothing's 'up', Jeff" and goes on to 
            say she is onto something that requires some investigation. Jeff is 
            eager to take action that may save them a rescue (and a few million 
            dollars) and says they're "all ears." She fills them in on the 
            Grafton project – Alan quickly recognises the name and figures he's 
            head honcho at Pacific-Atlantic monorail. Scott also exposits that 
            the company have had trouble with the US Government regarding their 
            safety precautions. Time to worry! Jeff surmises that Grafton needs 
            money, and Penelope says she'd told him a "friend" might be 
            interested. Jeff appears amused that she of course meant him. But 
            he's always looking out for "interesting engineering projects, 
            anyway." He wants to contact Grafton, and Penelope says he'll be 
            back in his New York office tomorrow. The scene ends on a 'look out 
            a storm's coming' fanfare over a shot of once-peaceful Tracy Island!
            It's night time in New York. Grafton is talking 
            to gathered members of his 'Syndicate' about the progress on fund 
            raising for the monorail. There's lots of gangster voices here and 
            extremely dodgy deals! Apparently, Monte Carlo will "clear up $4 
            million" and an oil deal in South America will make $7 million and 
            the "authorities won't even get near us." There's also a race track 
            that's sewn up $10 million. Grafton is very pleased indeed, and adds 
            this up to $21 million so far with just $19 million more left to go! 
            He boasts that he's set up the "greatest combined operation in the 
            history of big business." He reveals that tomorrow night Malloy and 
            another chap called Selesdon will break into Lady Penelope's mansion 
            and steal her famous jewellery! At exactly the same time (why, 
            though?) he will be showing Jeff Tracy the monotrain, taking him on 
            a "trip."
            Sure enough, the next thing we see is a 
            Pacific-Atlantic monotrain racing at speed along the hanging track. 
            Grafton's showing off one of the carriages to Jeff, who's there with 
            Tin-Tin and Brains. They're his engineers, after all, clearly along 
            to provide technical advice. Tin-Tin has to have an engineering 
            degree to have created that hairstyle, which seems about the same 
            size as her entire head!
            Jeff grills Grafton on why the US Government 
            won't back him. Grafton claims it's because he "never asked 'em." 
            The dodgy businessman is playing up the big cheese image, wielding a 
            cigar and a martini (or a margarita). He adds that he wants guys 
            like Jeff "to benefit" and champions private enterprise which keeps 
            "this country great"! Brains cautiously praises the monotrain 
            designers' skill and hopes that it's all been tested. Grafton 
            blusters that it has and that the "biggest men in the country" are 
            behind this project. Jeff's more concerned by what sort of men they 
            are, which Grafton wriggles out of really answering by saying 
            they're "modest…like you," and want to stay out of the limelight and 
            get it done "without a lot of ballyhoo." You mean, say, safety 
            checks, Graffy ol' boy? Jeff insists he needs to learn much more 
            about the system and Brains checks if the train really is all 
            "automatically controlled." Yes it is!
            This makes Jeff concerned about the potential 
            risk involved when there are no staff on board at all. Grafton 
            stupidly snorts that "crossing the road is a risk!" which is exactly 
            the WRONG thing to say! Jeff retorts that that's not the attitude to 
            take when "people's lives are involved." Grafton hastily assures 
            Jeff that a fleet of helijets watch the track at all times. "Unless 
            anything went wrong with the helijet," Jeff ominously predicts!
            There's a smooth transition here to one of the 
            helijets that Grafton mentioned, number 304. Come to think of it, 
            surely a bunch of helijets are way more expensive to run than a few 
            guys taking shifts on board the train itself? Anyway, a storm 
            appears out of nowhere and the helijet pilot, named Joe, reports to 
            his control tower that he's in for some "rough weather!" The control 
            tower fella sounds very pleased that HE has a "good strong roof" 
            over his head. Thunder nearly busts their eardrums and Joe the pilot 
            elects to "get out of this piece of sky before I get my feet wet." 
            So, this isn't a particularly useful system, Grafton? There are some 
            nice rain effects as the helijet moves off, but then lightning 
            strikes the craft! Joe ejects as the helijet begins to crash, and 
            despite miles of rock face either side, of course the helijet 
            EXPLODES into the monorail track!
            The crash smashes up the automatic systems that 
            the train relies upon and Joe, swinging down in his parachute, is 
            desperate to stop the train! He's caught on the tracks that weren't 
            destroyed by the crash and tries to climb up, but it slips and he's 
            well and truly stuck. He starts trying to call his base even as the 
            monorail track crumbles around him, and the doomed monotrain speeds 
            on!
            Back inside the train, I want to mention that 
            it's nice to see Jeff Tracy as the hard nosed businessman he must 
            have been, long before International Rescue. He's giving Grafton a 
            thorough interrogation and has been even LESS impressed by the 
            standards in 'cattle class' and its capacity to "pack in" passengers 
            (Jeff Tracy for UK transport minister)! Jeff says directly to 
            Grafton that he isn't "over-impressed" and Grafton blusters that the 
            power unit "upfront" will definitely "impress ya." Off they go to 
            check it out.
            The situation worsens at the far end of the 
            track. Metal is falling off from all angles and helijet pilot Joe is 
            still trying to get through to his base. It doesn't seem like anyone 
            can hear him!
            Now Grafton's showing off his fancy new monorail 
            engine, which he proclaims as, "the greatest chunk of engineering 
            genius in land travel history!" Jeff stubbornly remains underwhelmed, 
            dryly commenting, "Well, it's BIG enough, anyway." Oh, snap. Brains 
            has picked up on Jeff's mood, asking a tad sarcastically for a 
            closer look at this "piece, of, er, GENIUS." Grafton says to help 
            himself, but to be careful with it! Grafton then warns Jeff that 
            he'd be a fool to miss this opportunity. Jeff responds with "people 
            aren't cattle" and Grafton sniggers that he's wrong. "There's a few 
            of us who lead. The rest follow, like SHEEP." No, Grafton, you're 
            not winning over your audience with this angle!
            Brains and Tin-Tin have examined the engine, and 
            Brains is particularly worried by just how total the train 
            automation is. He asks one more time if there are any people on 
            staff at ALL? Grafton sneers that they "don't need 'em! Think of the 
            money we're going to save!" (with your fleet of helijets…) but 
            Brains starts to ask, "What if there's an emergency?" which Grafton 
            poo-poos with, "You worry too much."
            Irony BOOMS as the track continues to collapse, 
            but luckily for Joe the pilot, a relief helijet has come to find 
            him. Also, the weather's brightened up remarkably! Joe waves to his 
            rescuer. Hurry! It does look like he's going to be squelched any 
            minute beneath the crumbling track, but before long 'Stan' from 
            helijet 538 is standing above Joe ready to haul him up. To his great 
            credit, Joe insists on Stan radioing the train before he does 
            anything else, to tell them that the 'autosignals' are down and the 
            train won't be able to stop! Stan hopes that the train will be able 
            to stop manually. Clearly he didn't read his own operating manual 
            very closely.
            The train rockets onward – there's a really 
            impressive sensation of its sheer SPEED here. Grafton continues to 
            try to persuade Jeff Tracy that nothing can possibly go wrong with 
            the signals, insisting that they've spent lots of money on "safety 
            devices" (but apparently not an 'off' button) and fudges it by 
            saying "there's a certain element of risk in ALL operations of this 
            type…!" Dude, that's NOT WORKING on JEFF TRACY. Jeez. Grafton really 
            needs a decent PR assistant; this guy couldn't sell ice water in the 
            Sahara. Anyway, the phone goes to deliver the irony and Grafton 
            scurries out of the room to reply to it. Jeff barely hides how 
            pleased he is to have the guy gone, "Don't hurry," then asks Brains 
            what he thinks. Brains is none too happy about the setup, observing 
            that there are "too many loopholes." This is clearly what Jeff 
            wanted to hear, saying that Grafton is "clearly more interested in 
            money than in people's lives," and predicts, "those people usually 
            end up in one place. Jail."
            The smooth segue introduces us to Grafton's other 
            little plot. The two crooks, Malloy and Selsden, are speeding to 
            Lady Penelope's mansion. Malloy is still wearing his chauffeur's 
            uniform, and Selsden is the twitchy, James Cagney-sounding gangster 
            pal from the meeting scene. Selsden is nervous about ending up in 
            jail, and 'uh oh' music plays as Malloy reminds him how Grafton 
            "fixed" her alarms. Some distinctive music which will get used 
            extensively in the later episode "The Man from MI5" plays as the 
            crooks arrive at the mansion gates, and then the 'sneaking around' 
            music from "Vault of Death" follows as they reach it.
            We see Lady Penelope is fast asleep in her 
            luxurious, girly bedroom complete with four-poster bed and silks 
            everywhere. She snoozes away gently. In a more 'blokeish' room full 
            of right angles and brown linen, Parker also snores happily, 
            apparently sleeping off the effects of a lidded and handled pint mug 
            next to his bed. They both remain oblivious as the two crooks fiddle 
            with the locks on Penelope's front door. Selsden is doing most of 
            the fiddling, and is having a little trouble with it, but thinks 
            it'll be OK. Malloy grunts that he hopes Grafton's "having it as 
            easy as we are."
            Back on the monotrain, Grafton comes back and 
            shakily tells Jeff that they're all headed for major trouble! We 
            then see that the track is continuing to fall apart! Smoke and iron 
            is everywhere, and Joe the helijet pilot is hauled clear at the last 
            minute! The other pilot, Stan, greets him once he's safely inside 
            and Joe thanks him, but wonders if there's any hope for the train. 
            Stan doesn't seem to think so, pointing out that without signals it 
            won't be able to stop, and there isn't any manual control! Come on, 
            Grafton, ONE stop button and some one to push it. ONE guy!
            Inside the train, Jeff is keeping a cool head and 
            taking charge, so we can all see where Scott gets it from! He asks 
            Brains if he thinks he can stop the train. The scientist isn't 
            hopeful, as they have no circuit diagram, and Tin-Tin adds that she 
            isn't convinced they could even they DID have one! Jeff interrogates 
            Grafton, no longer hiding any impatience, asking how long it will be 
            until they reach the damaged section. Grafton has no idea, and 
            panics that the train is speeding up. They have maybe fifteen, maybe 
            twenty minutes, who knows? Jeff curtly replies "You're a GREAT help" 
            and tells Brains and Tin-Tin it's all up to them. No pressure!
            
            
            Back at Penelope's mansion, the crooks have found 
            their way inside and confirm that the alarms were "knocked out 
            good." They enter the library, and Selsden is nervous about the TV 
            cameras "in every room." Malloy growls that these were knocked out 
            by Grafton's gadget, too, "So relax." Selsden does a great nervous 
            giggle, "Ha ha, gee, that's good!" earning a sharp "Quiet!" from 
            Malloy. I love it when the bad guys bicker in this show! And it's 
            fun when the good guys do it, too! We see from the crook's point of 
            view that they've found the carpet where the safe is hidden. As 
            Penelope and Parker sleep on, the intruders uncover the safe! It's a 
            huge metal thing, which intimidates Selsden. Mallow snarls for him 
            to get on with it and to "keep it quiet!"
            His request for quiet neatly segues very nicely 
            into the HUGE EXPLOSION on the railroad. The helijet crew watches in 
            despair as yet more of it collapses into the valley, leaving a sheer 
            drop for the approaching train to fall into. Joe despairs that 
            "Nothing can save them now!" The music ends the sequence 
            dramatically, right on the halfway point!
            On the train, Grafton is shrieking at Brains and 
            Tin-Tin to do something, standing behind the huge engine whilst they 
            work on the other side of it. Jeff tells Grafton to calm down, 
            getting an 'I told you so' in there at the same time. Then Jeff 
            kneels beside Brains and quietly says he's going to "call the boys." 
            Brains replies that it's already too late, which Jeff knows, but he 
            wants their help after the crash if Brains can't get the train to 
            stop. Yikes. Tin-Tin is listening to this, there's some lovely 
            eye-acting going on here, her worry is clear as the stakes get 
            higher. Brains wonders how to call their base without giving away 
            that they're members of IR. Jeff has a plan.
            Jeff draws Grafton aside and asks if he's ever 
            heard of IR. Grafton, apparently not getting the point of this, 
            mutters that he has, but that nobody knows who runs them. That's a 
            line in there purely for ironic effect – grin or grimace? Jeff 
            replies that he "can't say," (with a suspicious sideways glance) but 
            he "thinks" you just send out a distress call to get them. Which you 
            MIGHT have thought that the helijet crew would have tried by now? 
            Anyway, Grafton practically drags Jeff to the radio, and Jeff 
            reminds Brains that he's "our only hope." To be fair, Tin-Tin is 
            doing her share, too! Brains is ready to try stopping the train 
            anyway, and says to her "Here goes. Let's hope we've got it right." 
            There's a click. Suddenly they're INCREASING speed! Brains is 
            aghast: "What did we do wrong?" Tin-Tin stresses, "I don't know I 
            don't KNOW!"
            A carriage up, Jeff is in the novel position of 
            ringing his own organisation for aid, and gets through to John in
            Thunderbird Five. Jeff cagily fills him in, adding "Make it 
            snappy. Time is running out." Which can only be taken as an order! 
            Seconds later, John is calling Scott who's hanging out by his dad's 
            desk. Can I just take a minute from the adventure to point out the 
            decent outfit Scott's wearing for once? A dark brown shirt, which 
            matches his hair, and light cream slacks Awww. Anyway, Scott takes 
            the call and John tells him the bad news. Their dad's monotrain is 
            headed for a crash! Scott stammers, "How…when?" and Virgil (who had 
            been sitting just out of shot until now) doubts that they can make 
            it in time. Scott knows this, but "We can't just sit here!" and he 
            dives off for Thunderbird One with Virgil right behind him. 
            Phew.
            The train speeds on. Brains is trying to stop the 
            it again, but with no success. Grafton panics, "It didn't work! 
            We're gonna crash!" and the scene transitions into an ALMIGHTY roar 
            and explosion, but don't worry – it's just Scott taking off in 
            Thunderbird One. Things are so urgent, and the episode so well 
            paced, that there's no need for any extra padding and Thunderbirds
            One and Two launch in record time. Help is on the 
            way!
            After all that speed, events are slower inside 
            Lady Penelope's mansion. The two crooks are still on the floor, 
            working on the safe. Selsden finally thinks he has the hang of the 
            combination. Does this mean he's at least as talented as Parker? 
            Both International Rescue agents are snoozing still, and I notice 
            that Penelope has left her teal eye makeup on while she sleeps, 
            perhaps after one too many sherries. Parker snorts and snuffles in 
            his more restless sleep. The two crooks are almost there; after two 
            anxious close-ups they have the safe completely open!
            This immediately triggers a shrill alarm in 
            Penelope's bedside lamp, and she starts to wake up. Parker's rather 
            more gravelly-voiced alarm shoves him into wakefulness, too.
            Unaware that they're busted, Malloy congratulates 
            Selsden on a good job, but it's Malloy who actually gets to open the 
            lid! Penny's jewels are all on display, and Penelope is watching 
            them from a screen (hidden behind a painting) in her room. She talks 
            to Parker on a radio, "It appears we have visitors." Parker sleepily 
            notes that it's "our old friend Malloy" and Penelope is upset that 
            they're going to nick her collection. Parker thinks it might be too 
            late to stop them as they probably have a car waiting. Penelope 
            instead decides that they have "no choice," which seems to involve 
            Parker popping upstairs with some hardware. Gulp. Get out of the 
            country when you hear her say that.
            The crooks have cleaned out the safe and are 
            making their escape. Parker's struggling to yank a large brown bag 
            out from underneath his bed. There's excellent puppet work here, as 
            he grunts and mutters "Come on!." He needs to hurry! The crooks are 
            about to drive off when gunfire begins to rake their car! Penelope 
            and Parker are taking home defence to all-new levels, firing machine 
            guns at the thieves. The crooks take cover on the other side of the 
            vehicle. Selsden wibbles, "Who's the Calamity Jane?" and Malloy says 
            "That's the Duchess, you dumb CLUCK!" which, let's face it, is 
            hilarious. Penelope thinks nothing of shooting at them even more 
            whilst dressed in floaty fluffy nightgown and probably matching 
            kitten heels. The two crooks make a run for it, hiding in a bush 
            next as Penny praises Parker's shooting. They seem a bit 
            traumatised, to be honest! Next, they scamper towards FAB One's 
            garage, and Penelope icily remarks, "Well I'm afraid that won't do 
            them much good."
            Parker is more disturbed by how they got in, in 
            the first place. Penelope agrees that they probably put the alarms 
            "out of action" somehow and is just glad that the safe camera is on 
            a different circuit! Yes, maybe time to redesign! Then they hear 
            glass breaking, and Parker surmises that the thieves have reached
            FAB One! Penelope is now unconcerned, merely hoping that 
            "they don't scratch the paintwork" as she's off to Ascot in the 
            morning! Despite FAB One being something of a super car, it 
            still seems to be easy to hotwire it and the crooks burst out of the 
            garage without even opening the doors! Parker checks that she 
            doesn't want him to shoot at the Rolls-Royce, and she assures him 
            she doesn't, because "he wouldn't succeed" and "there's no need." 
            She twists a column next to the bed, which is the default control 
            for FAB One to go in circles for the rest of time. Or at 
            least until it runs out of gas…but it could be atomic like half the 
            other vehicles on this show!
            Penelope coolly suggests that now they can both 
            go back to bed, and forget all about the crooks until the morning as 
            "they'll still be around." We see the car continuing to turn around 
            and round a statue of a Roman soldier, whilst 'comedy comeuppance' 
            music plays over it. Waah waah.
            Oh yes, and there's still the story of the doomed 
            monotrain! The entire track is collapsing and the helijet crew have 
            just seen the train approaching! It occurs to them that perhaps NOW 
            they should ring emergency services. Seriously, what the heck were 
            you waiting for?
            Grafton panics now that they're "almost at the 
            bend!" and Tin-Tin snuggles into Jeff's chest as Brains takes one 
            FINAL attempt at getting it right! This time, the brakes start to 
            kick in! At the speed they are doing they also appear to be catching 
            fire, but, the train IS grinding to a halt! Jeff praises the 
            scientist, but Brains just hopes there's enough track left! There's 
            more screeching and grinding, everyone looks sweaty and terrified. 
            Grafton whines, "We're STILL going too fast!" and Jeff snaps 
            gruffly, "Oh, SHUT UP!" Heh. Brains is bracing as the train ride 
            grows slower and bumpier, and Grafton tumbles to the floor whilst 
            Jeff hugs Tin-Tin close with a very worried frown! They're almost at 
            the bridge and the helijet crew exclaims that they're still going 
            too fast!
            The train reaches the smashed section and comes 
            to a tenuous stop just above the edge of the valley. Phew. The 
            helijet pilot named Stan reports that the train is OK and tells them 
            he's called emergency services and is returning to base, as he has 
            just five minutes of "endurance" left. Yeah, or IR will have TWO 
            (WO?) rescues to deal with!
            
            
            Inside the train, Grafton picks himself up and 
            Tin-Tin cries with relief, "We made it, Mr Tracy. We're safe!" 
            There's lots of sniffling and consoling. Exactly then, we hear some 
            familiar engines overhead. It's Thunderbird One! Scott – 
            this must be WEIRD for him – demands Virgil's ETA at the "danger 
            zone." Virgil reports that he'll be there in "six minutes" and Scott 
            praises his speed, telling him "it looks as if they made it." 
            Grafton, Jeff and Tin-Tin are watching from a shattered window in 
            the one posh part of the train. Scott informs them from his 
            loud-hailer that they're all still in danger and the track is still 
            about to collapse! It proves this by exploding some more. He says 
            he'll try to push the train back "off the trestle" but as he moves 
            in it looks very wobbly and EXPLODES, too. Scott cries out, "Oh no! 
            The trestle!" He tells them that it's crumbling under the train's 
            weight and that he can't save the train, "but your lives are more 
            important." That's comforting, Scotty. He instructs them to head for 
            the rear end of the train and to try and walk back along the track. 
            He urges them to hurry! They try to do this, but when Jeff, Tin-Tin, 
            Brains and Grafton try to leave, the tracks shudders and also gives 
            way! Grafton panics and Jeff harrumphs, "For a start, we'll keep 
            calm!" which I figure is mainly because he doesn't want to look like 
            a wimp in front of Tin-Tin.
            Scott instructs them all to head back to the 
            middle of the train and I suppose he at least kept them moving and 
            distracted until Thunderbird Two showed up. Virgil is there 
            a minute later, and Thunderbird Two glides above the doomed 
            train. Virgil lowers the temperamental 'grabs' from her 
            undercarriage, the grabs slowly descend and Virgil concentrates. 
            Scott chimes in with "careful, Virgil" but he's got rather a lot 
            invested in this rescue, too! Virgil tries to manoeuvre the grabs 
            with the carriage attached, shaking it violently. Grafton squeals 
            "they tryin' to moider (murder) us or somethin'?." Now either that, 
            or Scott's "be careful" comment has given Virgil a big old frown in 
            the next closeup! Vigil lowers Thunderbird Two further, 
            making the surrounding trestle EXPLODE yet more. Scott micromanages 
            again, telling him to "close grabs" (no, really?) and Virgil does, 
            then starts lifting up the carriage and some more hopeful sounding 
            music plays!
            Virgil lifts the carriage away just as the whole 
            monorail trestle collapses into the valley, creating YET MORE 
            EXPLOSIONS! Let's just hope it was the right carriage, eh? Only 
            kidding. Virgil gently sets the carriage down on a ledge, and I'm 
            not 100% sure how the rescuees get up from there, but perhaps those 
            mythical 'Emergency Services' will come along in a minute with a 
            rope? Anyway, International Rescue have triumphed again!
            Scott is instantly happy and cheers Virgil, 
            telling him, "Nice work!" Virgil assures Scott that he can leave 
            "everything to me now! And Scott heads off without a fight, signing 
            off with a REALLY gleeful, "FAB! Returning to base!" As he goes, 
            Virgil releases the grabs.
            Jeff's still comforting Tin-Tin in the remains of 
            the carriage as Grafton crows, "We made it!" and Jeff responds with 
            a far icier, "WE made it?" Grafton concedes, "You know what I mean…" 
            Jeff comments that Grafton won't need his investment money now as 
            after the inevitable government investigation into this, "You'll be 
            spending a nice long holiday. Behind BARS!"
            Grafton blusters that Jeff is all wrong about 
            that. "I'm too smart, I'll get away with the inquiry, and I'll end 
            up by being President of the greatest monorail network in the 
            world!" At this, Jeff exchanges a long look with Tin-Tin. Honestly, 
            this lightweight has NO IDEA who he's dealing with!
            But for a second or two, it appears that Grafton 
            might just have gotten away with it. He finishes a speech by 
            declaring, "yet another network of the Pacific-Atlantic Monorail is 
            open!" And the next angle shows that he's actually locked up in 
            jail, with the rest of his gang! Perhaps he was pretending to be the 
            celebrity he'd have persuaded to open it for him. Anyway, his gang 
            respond with a sharp, "Drop dead" and a "Cut it out…we're in no mood 
            for games!" Poor James Cagneyesque crook Selsden complains that he's 
            "still giddy" from Penelope's car. Malloy is bitter that she kept 
            them "spinning all night" to the extent that he was even "glad to 
            see the cops the next morning!" Grafton still isn't living in the 
            present, protesting that all they need is "a little more dough!" and 
            the others sneer at him, "You're wasting your time!" Grafton muses 
            that time is "one thing we've got PLENTY of!" and the 'waah waah' 
            music plays over a final shot of Grafton and his gang's jail bars 
            over a blue sky. I think someone's going to get 'shanked', tonight!
            So the bad guys truly get their comeuppance in a 
            far stronger episode this time. This is a brisk, no-nonsense 
            adventure, where they really appear to have figured out how to use 
            the pacing and constructed a very interesting, multi-levelled story. 
            It has a basic moral tone, maintaining that humanity must not be 
            lost against the surge of super-technology. It perfectly contrasts 
            Grafton's relentless money-grubbing against Jeff's sterner set of 
            ethics, and although the irony of the disaster during Grafton's 
            sales pitch is heavy handed and unavoidable, it really works and 
            gives us more stake in the rescue. Even the Lady Penelope and Parker 
            section is good fun, but they really need to have a better place for 
            their automatic weapons! It's hard to fault this episode, and it 
            really stands out as a tense yet fun example of what the show can do 
            at its very best.